Chapter 1:

1 : Back from the Play

(2020 revised edition)

Masumi Hayami, you coward.

His meticulous plan for the perfect date followed by a big revelation over diner had failed, and he couldn't muster up the strength to tell Maya the truth. A cynical little voice in his head told him it was for the best, as there was no longer any doubt that she loathed him to the core. Although the cold finality of the thought was depressing, he had to accept it, and try his best to move forward. Lately though, things had seemed to have changed in their relationship. They've had casual, peaceful interactions, even the beginning of trust...or so it had seemed. So he had imagined. How could he have been so stupid? There was no way she could ever forgive him, the disastrous ending to their otherwise perfect afternoon was proof enough and he could still recall it with painful clarity. How his warm concern for her anxiety had turned into ice as, glaring at him, she spat: "If Tsukikage Sensei ends up like my mother, I swear I will never forgive you!" All sympathy gone, not even a trace left: only hatred.

It was hopeless. No amount of roses could ever erase the cruelty of his intrusion in her privacy, or how he had toyed with her emotions and delayed her reunion with her sick mother, playing God with their lives, all for the sake of promoting her as he would a shining new product, trying to earn greedy sponsors and sympathetic fans by flaunting her past like a selling point. His hubris had destroyed the only chance of happiness he ever had with her. If only he had realized sooner that his obsession was no longer a sign of professional admiration, but a symptom of something much more personal, he could have used this privileged time with her so differently!

He parked his car on the side of the road, lit up a cigarette and exhaled the smoke with a bitter sigh.

Now all I can do is watch over her…secretly.

He glanced at the passenger seat. Lying there, a formal omiai picture was smiling back at him. Ignoring the sharp pain in his chest, he reached for it and, resting his wrists on the wheel, stared at beautiful woman in the portrait. He had been a fool to hope. All these years he had repressed his feelings, letting them grow in the shadow of his wildest dreams, dreaming that one day she would grow up, one day she would see, one day she would notice. But she had labelled him her archenemy, with good reason, and his very name and existence were the property of Daito, so he should have known better. This foolish romance had been doomed from the start, and he had been an idiot and a masochist to even dare contemplate it.

---

"I will only let go of your hand if you promise you'll keep me company after the play"

Hayami-san, sometimes I'm not sure I really know you.

"Please….say yes."

It is as if there were two very distinct people inside of you. One cold and cruel at times...the other…

"I enjoyed spending the day with you….Thank you."

I don't know. I'm lost.

"Maya, your tea...Oi, Maya!"

Why were they calling her? Across the table, Sayaka and Rei were staring strangely at her.

"Wh…?"

"Your Tea!" Rei was already up on her knees, snatching the teapot from her hands as the liquid kept pouring out of the cup like a small steaming fountain. Maya took another second to realize she was the source of the commotion, and that her absentmindedness was now threatening the dozen of scripts displayed on the table, which Sayaka rescued just in time. Right, Maya thought while moping, we were discussing my next project. I still haven't chosen a part, and there are so many proposals, so why am I instead thinking about Hayami-san in such a dire situation!

"Maya," Rei said with concern in her voice "Are you sure you're alright?"

"Of course!" Her high-pitched and unsteady tone betrayed her lie «Why wouldn't I be?"

I've never brought anyone here before. You're the first.

"I don't know Maya...Ever since you came back from that play, you've been acting weird. Did anything happened?"

"Oh yeah," added Sayaka "And you never told us who invited you!"

Maya felt herself blushing.

"Oh that...I don't know, they never came."

She didn't know why exactly, but she didn't want her friends to know that Masumi Hayami was in fact the mystery man who invited her that night, not to mention, that he insisted to spend the entire day with her…or worst of it all, that she accepted.

She couldn't even unravel her own feelings about the entire episode, especially about the way he grabbed her hand, refusing to let her go. If anything, she was grateful that she stayed and complied with him. Had she ran away she would never have seen him like that. Masumi Hayami: kind, warm. Lonely.

He had such warm hands too...she could still feel a painless tickling on the back of her hand, like an imprint of his warmth tattooed on her. She knew she ought to be careful not to allow herself to trust him after what he did to her mother little over a year ago, and especially now that Tsukikage Sensei had left her all alone, again...yet from time to time, she couldn't help herself from running her fingertips on that strange invisible stain his touch had left her with.

What wouldn't she give to finally meet Mr Purple Rose, at a time like this! To finally be able to talk to him, to pour her thoughts and feelings into him, to ask him for advice! She knew that he, he alone would understand her. He would tell her whether she was on the right track, what part to choose next! He would tell her what to think of Hayami Masumi…

"I bet that was your mysterious fan!" Sayaka pulled her out of her meditation "The one who keep sending you roses!"

"You forget there was no rose attached to the invitation," snapped Rei "So it can't be him, right Maya?" Her tone still showed signs of concern.

"C-course! No, it can't be him…"

Associating Hayami Masumi's uncanny behavior to anything Mr Purple Rose was capable of doing was alarming in itself.

It can't be…

---

"Stop it now… I've made my decision...It's the only way...Then it's the best way, for her... Listen, no stop it! Just do as I say. Please, you know you're the only person I can ask that. Only you can do it. ..Eight o'clock... It has to be this way... Yes, I'm sure...Thank you."

Masumi hung up with an unnerved sigh and checked his watch. 5:30. He leaned back on the wall and shut his eyes for a second. It was done. It may be the biggest mistake of his life, or his chance of redemption, or both, but it was done. A lot was going to happen in the next few days, but only one that mattered: How was Maya going to react?

He thanked the nurse as she left his father's aisle of the mansion and waited for another minute before entering. The walk through the long corridor leading to the main living room allowed him to gather his wits and his determination. There, in the armchair by the central window, bathed in the dimming light of the sunset, a blanket covering his knees, Eisuke Hayami was looking back at him.

"Evening Masumi. You're home early"

"Evening, father. Yes, the video conference with SM Entertainment executives was cancelled after yesterday's scandal. Besides, I needed to talk to you."

"Oh?"

"Yes. I have been thinking about your omiai offer with the Takayama family." order would have been a better word to define the manner with which his so-called father had presented him with the proposal "I am here to tell you that I have decided to accept."

---

"Hey, Maya! Guess what just came in for you?"

Maya tore herself from Hamlet and what just about to stand up when Sayaka showered her with a sweet scent that sent her heart racing.

"Purple Roses!"

"And, » Rei followed Sayaka to the floor around the small table "they came with a letter!"

Maya grabbed the letter and feverishly tore it open before reading it aloud."Maya-sama" the girls giggled, as nothing was more chivalrous than the combination of first name and honorific address. "Would you do me the honor of joining me for dinner tonight…"

She lost her voice somewhere there.

---

Masumi raised his eyes toward the clock above the chimney. The light in his library was subdued, but he could still see the hand ticking toward 7:50. In fact, he could hardly tear his gaze away from it.

---

The round table felt empty as she waited alone in the private room. Soon Mr. Purple Rose would be sitting right in front of her. He would probably smile at her. What would his smile look like? His eyes?

What if he didn't like me?

Maya recognized the sensation, and it sent a chill down her spine. The last time Mr. Purple Rose had invited her to dinner, she was feeling exactly the same. In fact, she was in that same restaurant at that same wonderful private table sitting on the same chair, even wearing the same dress he gave her for the occasion; so recalling the way she was fidgeting in her seat, unable to control her breathing and glancing anxiously at the corridor, was easy. Only he didn't show up, and the disappointment that followed the wait months ago had left her with a dread she couldn't forget.

What if he decided not to come? What if…

Before she could finish her thought, steps from the corridor announced someone's arrival in the private room.

Her heart was beating so loud in her chest, she was afraid he might hear it. She tried focusing on her fists clenched on her knees as she remembered how, a few months from then, she had launched off her chair and bowed to none other than Hayami Masumi. For a second, she had thought that he might…

Her hand tickled again.

She reminded herself that no, it was impossible, and that it was in any case, neither the time nor place to remember that day, not when Mr. Purple Rose, her first fan, the only one who truly mattered and the one she'd always wanted to meet, was about to sit in front of her and she didn't even have the courage to meet his eyes! Come on, Maya! You can do it!

Slowly, almost painfully, she raised her head and searched for the eyes of the person facing her. Instantly, her heart sank.

---

Hino Kimura, the housekeeper of the Hayami mansion, was bringing the usual eight o'clock whisky on a silver tray when she entered the east wing library, until what she saw nearly made her drop it.

Barely lit by the dimming fire, Hayami Masumi was sitting back in his armchair, head down, one hand covering his eyes. Yet she could still see a tiny crystal glistering along his cheek, trembling on his clenched jaw.

The old woman had served the family long enough to know that Young Master Hayami hadn't shed a tear since his mother's death.

---

"Are you surprised to see me here?"

"Hijiri-san..." she could barely breathe.

Hijiri Karato sat in front of her, an unreadable expression on his face.

"Yes. I am Mr. Purple Rose."